Tristan Needs a Home

Intelligent and fun-loving, Tristan is a darling little boy with a wonderful sense of curiosity. He loves learning new skills and is so proud to have learned to tie his shoes! With loving adoptive parent(s) who are ready to commit to him and claim him as their own, Tristan should grow into a wonderful young man. This is a boy with potential! Because of the hardships of his early years, Tristan is searching to find the place where he belongs.

Tristan, who loves mac and cheese and the colors yellow and purple, dreams of visiting Disneyland someday. He would love to belong to a family that takes fun vacations. Tristan enjoys art and adores gardening. He likes to help around the house and his green thumb has him dreaming of planting “more flowers, veggies, more trees, and… more berries.” This endearing boy says the sweetest things. Two of his utmost wishes are that “candy was good for you” and that he could have “2000 mint cookies”.

In the fall of 2012, Tristan will be in second grade. He is a bright boy who made significant strides in his regular mainstream classroom at a local public school last year. Tristan excels at reading and math, and while academics are not a big concern, he does need behavioral supports in the classroom

Tristan came into foster care in early 2011. At this time, ONLY Washington and Oregon families will be considered to make sure he remains close to his great grandmother who is his current care provider. Because Tristan is not yet legally free, interested adoptive parents from Oregon and Washington need to be licensed for foster care and have an approved adoption homestudy completed.

Tristan has been in the care if his maternal great grandmother since mid 2011. With the stability, consistency, structure, and patience she provides Tristan has been able to grow and flourish. She feels, however that her age precludes her from being his permanent family. They have strong bonds, though, and both hope she and Tristan want her to remain a part of Tristan’s life in the years to come.

Tristan has experienced deep sadness at the separation from his birth mother; his birth father, though, is no longer in the picture. Tristan, who understands that being adopted means that he will be raised by a new family, would like two parents, a dog, and maybe one other child, although he would not mind being an only child. He hopes for “a happy family” with a home that is “big and fun,” just like his current one, and a tent so he can invite friends for sleepovers. He also wishes for an adoptive parent to be “someone nice…to love me.”

Tristan struggles with feelings of sadness and anger at the losses he has experienced and his feelings of abandonment are never far from the surface. He is also very anxious about the future. He says of himself, “I am not a bad kid; I just make bad choices sometimes.” His great grandmother describes Tristan as a helpful, friendly boy. Tristan, himself, affirms that he is “very friendly and loveable, aren’t I?…” Tristan’s difficulties with transitions and changes in his schedule and environment can be managed pretty well by preparing him ahead of time for what is to happen. Tristan needs adults to help him remember what he can do to feel better when he is feeling overwhelmed and to help him better manage his impulsiveness. It is essential that his adoptive folks commit to having ongoing participation in therapeutic services to help Tristan overcome his emotional and behavioral hurdles.

The family chosen to adopt this wonderful boy will need to be patient and capable of earning his trust, and be willing to allow him to bond and attach on his own individual timeline. A family that will reach out to Tristan and express love and commitment, even when he is slow to express it back, will be able to help Tristan the most. The family able to meet the challenges of Tristan’s special needs will be richly rewarded as he continues to blossom. It will be important for Tristan’s adoptive parents to have a good grasp of how past abuse, neglect and exposure to unsafe situations can impact a child’s development, sense of well being, and trust.

Tristan is available for adoption through the State of Oregon. For contact information, please contact the Idaho CareLine at 1-800-926-2588.