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Father helps grieving families following daughter’s murder

By Steven Sarabia

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    SCOTTSDALE, Arizona (KPHO/KTVK) — A father whose daughter was murdered in Scottsdale in 2015 now helps other grieving parents going through the same pain he once went through. “There’s no real main advice because everyone grieves differently. Some people are able to move on, some people like my wife still struggling after eight years,” said Harley Feldman, a board member with the group Parents of Murdered Children.

Through this group, Feldman can help those going through the same pain of loss he faces. “We can’t make the problem go away, but we can help people with their grieving and their legal issues, and that’s what we exist for.”

When a parent loses a child, Feldman said it can feel like your world is falling apart, but knowing you are not alone can help in the healing process. “They’re struggling with the transition they are now going to have to make, their life is going to change, and I try to help them the most.”

He recently reached out to Lauren Heike’s mother. Lauren was killed last month while on a trail in Scottsdale. After the tragic incident, he knew he had to reach out. “I’m trying to help her. It helps because I’ve been there. She was struggling with what to do and how to act. She was in shock the first time I talked to her and now she’s trying to deal with the issues as they come up,” said Feldman.

He said one of the most frustrating processes for a parent is how long a murder trial can take. In his experience, the murder trial for the suspect in his daughter’s case still goes on eight years after her death. It’s something he tells other grieving parents to prepare for. “Everything, all the decisions take a long time to make and I understand them but it’s just frustrating.”

The murder trial for the suspect in Feldman’s daughter’s case was in the appeals court this week. Currently, judges are deciding if certain evidence can be used in a criminal trial. Feldman said it could still be another year before the actual trial begins.

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