Parents of murdered children are putting faith over trauma

By Blake Keller

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    SAGINAW, Michigan (WNEM) — Local communities continue to feel the impact of gun violence. In fact, more than 100 Americans are killed with guns in the United States every day.

One Saginaw woman knows the pain of losing someone to gun violence all too well. Instead of living with the pain, some parents in mid-Michigan are choosing faith over trauma.

“They may pull that trigger, but there’s families… we’re impacted,” said Tamara Tucker, life-long Saginaw resident.

Over the years, Tucker has had to deal with the loss of five of her family members. She could say life is unfair, but that goes against her faith. The most painful loss came in March 2019. Her pregnant daughter, MoeNeisha Simmons-Ross, was gunned down in her Saginaw home.

“My world was crushed when she was murdered. What parent wants to lose their child? The most awful thing to encounter. It’s a whole different hurt when you lose your child,” Tucker said.

When TV5 met with Tucker for an interview, she wore a bright red shirt with her daughter’s face on it.

“I put this picture on because this is her sultry, cute look. She had a big smile. Anyone remembers her, remembers her smile. She loved being a mom raising her boys,” Tucker recalled.

In her lifetime, tragedy from gun violence would strike three other times. She lost her sister, Tia Pittman, in 2019. Pittman was gunned down in Florida. Tucker told TV5, even three years later, they are still in the process of fighting the state of Florida for custody of her sister’s kids. Tucker also lost her brother, Elton Moenay Simmons Jr., when she was only 15-years-old. Her most recent loss came in September 2021. Her nephew, Ty’rone Simmons Jr,. died after being shot at Stephens and Woodbridge Street.

“He was a good dad… took care of his babies, two children he left behind,” Tucker added.

So many families’ lives changed forever. Tucker’s would too. She revived the local chapter of the Parents of Murdered Children (POMC) organization. Her friend and community activist, Markeen Baker, has provided needed support.

“I haven’t been directly impacted, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be an ally,” Baker said. “Not everybody has that power to experience something like that and hold it together.”

Prior to the interview with TV5, Tucker said she recently had an epiphany, grabbing the obituaries of her family members.

“When I picked up, it was this right here, I got so choked up. These are my recent family members, my family members. I have four, actually five, because my daughter was pregnant,” she said. “Five family members, right here in my hands, like this is the end result of the violence.”

When other parents are ready to talk, POMC is there to help in the grieving process. In one way or another, it helped Tucker grieve, too.

“I remember having a dream. Dec. 6, 2020, she told me, ‘mom, you still have to live,'” Tucker recalled. “And that day, I was able to cry and release that pain from losing her. That was a miracle. It’s unreal. Faith held me together.”

That support system often goes beyond mourning, too.

“It’s hard for some people to sit and talk about it, without missing that person. We’re here to help in the beginning process. Whenever you are ready. I am here. I’m listening. I understand,” Tucker said.

“Nobody wants to be a part of the group, but it’s a good support system,” Baker said. “You never truly heal from it, but it’s a remedy.”

Both Tucker and Baker said there’s a lot of layers when it comes to preventing gun violence. They said having the right people at the table and in the conversation would help. Baker also said community engagement, like after-school programs or more recreational centers, may help curb the violence.

“This is our community. We have to come together, form a plan and execute,” Baker said.

The Parents of Murdered Children organization, though, may be a great place for parents and families to start.

“It helped me to see I was living with fear from the time my brother was killed, and I was struggling to let my kids live,” Tucker said. “The way God works things out, you know, you never know. You can question God. He’ll give you answers. He will put your heart at peace.”

The local chapter of Parents of Murdered Children meets at Newer Dimensions Fellowship Ministries at 3430 Jefferson St. in Carrollton Township. Chapter meetings are over Zoom on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 6 p.m. One-on-one Facebook live sessions are on Sundays at 5 p.m. In-person meetings happen every third Saturday of the month from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.

You can contact the organization at SaginawCountyGBR.POMC@gmail.com or 989-332-8864.

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