Widow recounts how romance scammer cost her everything, now she’s warning others

By Mallory Sofastaii

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    BALTIMORE (WMAR) — A romance scammer cost a Pennsylvania woman everything. Her life savings, her home, and her dogs. She’s had to rebuild her life from scratch, and she’s openly sharing her experience to help others avoid the same fate.

It all started with a friend request.

“We got friendly very quickly and moved off of Facebook onto an app so that we could talk to one another. And we spoke for a few months before he ever asked for any money, so there was a layer of trust that was laid down,” said Kate Kleinert.

He said his name was Tony and he was working in Iraq as a surgeon. He sent her numerous photos, but the man depicted isn’t who Kleinert was speaking with.

“How often were you talking to him?” Mallory Sofastaii asked Kleinert. “Four, five times a day at that point,” Kleinert responded.

And he kept coming up with reasons for why he needed Kleinert to send him money.

“Fast forwarding to $39,000 later, I had sent him everything that I had. But he promised when he got to see me, he would pay me back,” Kleinert said.

When that day came, he was a no show at the airport forcing Kleinert to see the truth.

“I cried for days and days. Losing the money was, of course, devastating. It was all I had. But losing that love was even worse,” said Kleinert.

Unable to afford repairs to her HVAC, Kleinert experienced another setback.

“And I woke up one morning in July of last year and the air conditioner was spitting fire all over the living room. And the house burned down. I lost everything including the six hospice dogs. Everything I owned, was gone,” Kleinert recalled.

She had no choice but to start over. AARP stepped in to help, and also gave her a platform to help others. Kleinert now speaks with other scam survivors, at senior centers, and to groups.

“Out of those people, there’s at least a half a dozen who whisper in my ear, I’m in the same situation. I don’t know where to go, I don’t know what to do,” said Kleinert.

She reminds them it’s not their fault. These scammers use a playbook. They take their time developing these relationships, and they squeeze as much out of them as they can.

“He still thinks he could come here and marry me even though I know now he’s not the handsome doctor in the pictures that I received. That’s not him at all. I did see him once on a face-to-face call. Only one time did he allow that. And he lives in South Africa,” Kleinert told Sofastaii. “So, the real Tony FaceTimed with you and acknowledged that he wasn’t the surgeon sending you these photos?” Sofastaii asked. “Yes,” said Kleinert. “And did he acknowledge that he’s been scamming you all along?” Sofastaii asked. “Get over it. Put it behind you. Can’t we move forward? So, there’s no remorse. There’s no regret,” said Kleinert.

Kleinert said it’s important to speak with family members and loved ones about these scams. To come from a place of caring so they feel comfortable opening up to you. And never send money to someone you don’t know well or haven’t met in-person.

To learn more about AARP’s Fraud Watch Network, click here. AARP also has a free fraud helpline for members and nonmembers. Trained fraud specialists and volunteers field thousands of calls each month and provide guidance that’s free of judgment. You can call the helpline at 877-908-3360. In addition, AARP offers online support sessions for further emotional support.

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